I hear Your voice... deep in the stirring of my heart. Barely though, like a whisper. But it has moved me more than the loudest praise and worship or the confidence and fire of a leader.

It's a bittersweet feeling. A sweet, peaceful, quiet and refreshing drop tied with the deepest sorrow and suffering I have ever felt.

It's filled with the cry of that undying light inside of me that was given to me by You (because it is that little piece of You, I believe) that desperately wants to be united back with its Creator, with its whole self.

It hurts so much in the most beautiful way and it's the greatest mystery that in the next second of adoration, I could desecrate and revile it with a simple "free choice" into darker oceans.

One moment I blame You for everything, the next I'm begging You for forgiveness.

It's true.. I can't have two masters.

I need to make my choice.

But how many times have I made that choice?