Emotional vent:

Sometimes I feel like who I am, my good and my bad, is just a source of problems to other guys.

I see the hater glares, the under the breath comments, the backstabbing remarks, the half meant jokes, the constant teasing and trolling. Body language, tone of voice and eye contact are easy to read (I assume) and you should just be honest if you don't really like me.

I'm not too sure what it is exactly about me--although I have a good idea--what the reason may be. But I'm not willing to admit it myself for fear of narcissism.

Either way, I do put part of the blame on my own insecurities and assumptions, but I do see the rest.

And it hurts.

But I can't stop you all from how you choose to perceive me.

We're all Christian and we're all called to love and forgive and so trust me when I say that I am trying my best.

It just sucks because being largely excluded from your own gender sometimes can take a huge tole on one's mental and social health.

I would know.

I really pray that you come to love yourself. If you're full of love, there wouldn't be room to hate or be jealous. That's something I'm working on myself. I hope that you all will come to realize this one day as well.