I guess so

I guess what hurts most is that I always hear these things about how "the suffering will end soon" or "the light is just around the corner" or "these days will end soon and the sun will rise" and yet my life doesn't seem to apply to those. Now I know those aren't the exact quotes but you get what I mean and am referring to right?

I mean, my life is great, it's wonderful, it's magnificent and I've learned so much from God...

But my suffering? My dark days? How are those words of advice supposed to help me when it was my choice to bring the darkness in..... you know..?

What do you do when the suffering is self-induced? No I'm not lonely, no I'm not hungry, or cold or sick or poor, but I'm lost in the most subtle of ways.

Sin.

I'm convinced God is not the One to be blamed, but only myself.

And I guess that's why it hurts because this suffering, this "loss," is all my fault. It was brought on with my own independent decision; my own free will.